Our heroine, Lullaby F.  Broadway, leaves the stage to become a teacher in the Western oddball town of Wharzis.  ’Whenever somebody new comes to town, they always ask ’Where’s this?’ So we named the town that!’ Cara Mel Turtle, the mayor’s secretary, explains.  Lullaby is promptly introduced to a class full of harebrained, over-sized children, including the ever-inquisitive Billy Wyzatt, Mary Knotyoo, Barney Himm, sisters Onna Break and Anita Break, Lida Bonfire, Juan Ferderode, Hugo Yurway and the feisty class bully, Bulldog Bishop.  However, their sweet new teacher has a secret — she is looking for her long-lost father.  ’Mother just can’t remember where she put him,’ she tells the audience.  And when she finds out that the town council ran the last teacher out of town when they discovered she was once an actress, Lullaby has two secrets to protect!  As if this isn’t bad enough, the villainous yet fellow Broadway actor Big Harry Deal shows up and proposes to her, threatening to blow her cover if she doesn’t accept and return to Broadway.  Lullaby, however, has fallen head-over-heels for Sheriff Delong Goodnight.  Harry tries everything to frighten Lullaby into returning to Broadway, from haunting the schoolhouse to trying to blow it up.  Toss in a couple town gossips, an absent-minded janitor and a growling mayor, and soon Lullaby finds herself on trial!  It is up to none other than Bulldog Bishop, who’s developed a crush on Lullaby, to help her out.  Classic Pat Cook puns and wisecracks fill this fast-paced, riotous mellerdrama, and it is up to Bulldog to save the day.  After all, he is the teacher’s pitt!